I've been having rather complete and complex dreams recently, but haven't reminded myself to REMEMBER THE DREAM the night before. And I'm sorry about that because my recollection is that the dreams were rife with meaning -- and would have been fun and informative to write up in this collection.
Last night and this morning were no exception. The only thing I remember -- and it was vivid enough to wake me up - was this:
At the end of my dream, I am standing outside somewhere. It feels like someone's great big back yard, with carefully mown grass and a few large shade trees. It's pleasantly warm with a gentle breeze. A woman approaches me. We know each other, but it's not clear in the dream how deep or extensive that relationship is. But it may be extensive.
She's talking to me about her plans for the upcoming day and near future. I stop her gently and ask her to explain to me what these plans mean. And she gives me an almost "Well, duh" look and says something along the lines of "Yes this means I'm having affairs. I'm cheating on you." I think she may have been a bit uncomfortable in telling me these things, but she had no intention of changing her plans.
And that's when I woke up. I totally did not expect this woman to say what she did say. I thought our relationship was strong enough and deep enough that such behavior was unthinkable. But the attitude of this woman was almost casual in making this announcement. There was nothing in the dream that lent me to think we were married, but what other arrangement would make sense?
Now I get this notion that this woman could be interpreted as my Anima. I buy into this big time. And from that basis, there are a variety of different interpretations as to what her announcement meant. Was this cheating something she was just starting to do or had she been cheating on me (whatever that might mean) for some time and was planning on continuing that behavior? And what would it mean for my Anima to cheat on me? Would she be looking to attach herself to a different facet of my personality? Is she just giving up on supporting our existing relationship? Does she think that the "me" she's been interacting with for all this time is, in fact, simply not the real me -- and she's going to try and find a more real me elsewhere?
As Deb and I move closer to relocating and downsizing, I'm seeing my getting rid of so much and many of the things I've identified with as being a paring down of my self identity to a more valid and clarified person. (That being getting rid of my boats, my juggling supplies, etc.) And in that context, maybe my Anima's announcement simply means she's testing out who these other, possibly more valid, versions of me are...
(I need to start remembering to REMEMBER YOUR DREAM again...)
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