Bad Dream 233 -- I'm Warren's Brother

In my dream, I'm attending a "Peewee Football" game, where all the players are around 8 to 12 years old.  They are all dressed in complete American football gear -- so this is not just a pick-up game.  It's a very "formal" event.  Deb (I'm pretty sure it's Deb) and I are sitting on the sideline, on what appears much more to be church benches than sports spectator chairs.  

The first part of the dream -- and the major one -- has Deb and me trying to sit in the right place to see the game.  Since there are no risers, anyone not in the front row will likely have a partially blocked view of the action.  And I really want to see everything.  I guess Deb didn't understand that, as she took a seat 3 or 4 benches back.  (Since the benches are very close to the action on the field, her decision makes sense.  She won't get clobbered by some small kid running at full speed.)  I go to her and explain my interest to her and she and I go the front bench, where some folks are already seated.  I find myself sitting next to a large, very powerfully built black man.  There's enough room for me to sit there, but not by much.  I feel I should start a conversation with him, but he doesn't appear to want to engage in chit chat.  

There are several segments of Deb and me sitting here or there, but finally we're sitting side by side on the front bench with a perfect view of the players.  (I'm no longer sitting next to the big guy.)  The players seem to be running through some warm-up drills prior to the game actually starting.  

One of the players walks over to us -- just a little bit hesitant as he's walking.  He stands in front of me and says something like:

"Excuse me, but I was noticing your face and how much it looked like Warren.  Are you related to him?"  (Warren being my youngest brother -- and currently the only brother who's still living...) 

I'm lightly stunned, as I never thought I looked that much like Warren, But I'm also impressed with this young man's overall demeanor and his perspicacity.  I acknowledge that I am his brother, and the young man walks back to his teammates.   

As he walks away, my mind is swimming with thoughts as to how to consider what's just happened.  I'm very fond of Warren, but recognize that he's lived his life into several severe problems (marriage, finances, career).

Is this a sign of something I should be doing or stop doing?

Bd Dream 232 -- What? Another One?

 I have a recurring theme to my dreams: and that is being in a classroom with a test being given.  And, for reasons that are occasionally mine -- but not always -- I am unprepared to do well.  On one occasion the instructor (who's often female in my dreams) spoke in a language that I was totally ignorant of.  And all the rest of the students understood her perfectly well.  She was giving instructions as to how to complete the test...  In others I was simply unprepared.  But in both cases, the rest of the class was ready to complete the test with few if any problems.  

In this case, the instructor had handed out a paper with a set of challenging but interesting questions several weeks ago.  I thought the questions would be fun to work on.  Someday.  But had just filed the paper away to work on other projects.  In fact, we were to have a test -- today!! -- on all those questions.  And, of course, all the other students in the class had understood this and had spent time away from class working on the questions.  

I felt I had a chance to give correct answers to some of the questions -- possibly enough of them to get a passing grade -- but certainly some of the questions would require significant time and preparation to answer.  

I picked a question that required the student (me) to fill in numbers in a Sudoku-style matrix.  And the matrix was to be drawn as part of the test.  I tried several times to draw a proper matrix, but sometimes the squares were too big and sometimes too small and other times drawn with the wrong writing instrument (e.g. a pen vs a pencil).  

I went through several sheets of paper trying to get the right size and shape of a matrix.  When I ripped off one particular piece of paper, I found that it had been the last one in the pack.  Fortunately, (?) I had another pack of paper, but it was a different size and color from the one piece of paper that had some partial responses to some of the other questions.  

As is often the case in these dreams, the teacher called "Time's up!  Please hand in your paper." when I was still essentially trying to get started.  The class ended and the students filed out, some of them handing in their paper at the last possible moment, suggesting that they weren't done.  Whereas I had barely started.  

After everybody -- including the teacher -- had left, I realized that I had answered a couple of questions and might at least get a "D" instead of an "F."  A friend magically appeared and offered to help me track down the lady (not the teacher) who had collected the papers so that I could submit my meager effort.  

The chase after the lady went to a terminal for trains or busses or something.  It was quite crowded.  My friend and I called out the lady's name -- and finally got a shouted-out response from the lady we'd been chasing.  We looked around feverishly to find her so I could submit my paper, but the crowd was tightly packed and we didn't have a fixed idea as to exactly where she was.  But we knew that the lady had every right to ignore us and get on her transportation and leave.  

I think I was awakened by the alarm at this point.  

Bad Dream 231 -- Missing My Airline Flight Because...

My dream starts with my family members and me at the airport.  They are here to see me off to a business occasion at some really nice place or other.  Convention, sales meet

I think it was one of my siblings -- probably David -- who set up my flight arrangements, and I didn't check with him on the details until now.  Letting him set this up seemed to be really important to him.  

So there are 4 or 5 of us gathered around me as I stand near a wall, and I ask my brother what my flight time departure was.  He told me the plane left in 15 minutes.  Now, we're in the first section of the airport -- nowhere near any departure gates.  And at this point, I don't even know which airline he selected.  So I can't even sprint madly towards the departure gate, since I hadn't a clue as to which direction in which to run.  

I ask him, as calmly as I can, which airline he was dealing with.  He wasn't sure.  I ask him to remind me which city I was supposed to fly to.  He didn't recall.  

My rising panic is met with an equivalent calmness: True I was going to miss my flight (and I recall that there were "opening ceremonies" scheduled for all of us who were attending this event.  So I will likely miss most or all of them.)  This will not go over with Corporate Management, as they had invested considerable funds to make this event something really nice.  And expensive.  

BUT there is nothing I can do except try to find the next flight and go from there.  Panic would only interfere with clear thinking on how to best handle this situation.  

I open my carry-on luggage to find my ticket -- to tell me where I should be headed.  A sensible step one.  To my great surprise, my ticket doesn't identify the destination city.  Or the time of the flight.  Or the airline scheduled to make the flight.

Okay, maybe now is the right time to start panicking.

I repeat my questions to my brother: What airline?  What city?  He's terribly embarrassed, as he wanted to prove something by handling my travel arrangements.  He still can't recall anything or any paperwork that might have the answers.

Somewhere along the line, a stranger stops to "help" me.  He nods his head and tells me that he understands that I'm looking to get the cheapest air fare and the best seating.  I tell him that, if the ticket cost $1000, that would be okay by me.  He shrugs his shoulders a bit and wanders off.  

I start rifling through the carry-on looking for any hint or where I should be headed.  If I could find sun block, it would suggest the meeting was somewhere in the south.  A bathing suit would suggest a shoreside event -- but not necessarily.  

Nothing in the bag helps me identify where I should be headed or anything like that.  

Bad Dream 230 -- Playing and/or Playing

In my dream, I am sitting on a rug on the floor of what feels like someone's house.  There's a gathering taking place at some distance from where I'm sitting -- and I'm retiring from that group.   As I do so often, I just want to get away from the buzz of conversation -- light, pleasant, superficial chitchat.  

I have a deck of cards and I plan to play a couple of games of solitaire before figuring out what to do next.  I really don't want to join the babble of conversation over there, but can't think of anything else to do. 

I start to lay out the cards for my first solitaire game, when a "friend" stops by to chitchat.  Oh boy.  I know this guy somewhat and am not that fond of him but he occasionally tries to chat me up.  Since he sees me trying to play a card game, he takes it on himself to start blathering on about cards and card games.  He has in his possession, several playing cards that I recognize as coming from my pack.  And since many/most card games require all 52 cards to play, his current holding of several of the cards from my deck wrecks my chance of playing my game.  

Someone else shows up, and the two of them begin chattering away in a conversation about playing cards -- a conversation that would allow me in but is concerning nothing in which I'm interested.  But I do remember something else that I could/should get involved with.  I gotta go.   

I leave my spot and walk a short distance down what feels like a hallway. I enter a large open room where there are a considerable number of people moving about, getting ready to put on a play.  (Fussing with costumes, applying makeup, and so forth.)  There's a nice feeling of excitement in all the preparations and I feel I'm an important part of it.  That is, I have a role to play in the performance.  Not necessarily the lead, but an important role nonetheless.  This may be a Shakespeare play, given the costumes that people are wearing, and I'm wearing black tights.  

Two young women approach me with my "tunic" or shirt or whatever.  It's white and seems to be made of a light cotton.  There's some image on the front that I don't quite get a good look at.  The two young women are amused -- they I should be concerned that my nipples might get aroused and visible through the shirt material.  

I'm okay with their amusement.  And I wake up.

Bad Dream 229 -- Finding the Flow

This dream showed up shortly before waking this morning.  I had awakened at 6:00 and went back to sleep and was awakened by Alexa at 8:00.  It's somewhat fragmented, but it felt important to record what I recall:

In my dream, I am in my car starting to drive home from some unidentified event.  I get down to a road I think I know, but am confused as to which way to go.  I recognize the size and shape of the road, but I have never entered that road at this point.  

I take what I feel is the right direction, but find myself in the wrong direction, as I see a lot of cars ahead with headlights rather than taillights.  I turn around and start in the other direction.  The dream shows me to be on a two-lane road sometimes and a four-lane divided highway at others, but it feels like the same road anyway.

Still not sure as to which direction to go, I pull off the road when I remember that my phone has a compass app -- which will clearly identify the direction I should take.  East or west.  When I park my car in the small parking lot of some place of business, I get out of the car and reach into my pocket for my phone.  What I find is a real compass, which I recognize from my teenage years, and this pleases me a great deal.  After identifying true north on my hand-held compass, I think I also call up the app to double-check.  Totally unnecessary, but I fell this is some kind of minor celebration: all alone by myself, I have figured out which direction in which to go.  

I get back in the car and head in the original direction in which I was travelling.  Yes, this feels right.  

Through the magic of dreams, my car has now transformed into a bicycle, (my orientation early on was that the right direction was left to right -- but now the right direction feels right to left, but it is still the one I initially chose) and I am pedaling easily down a comfortable two-lane road that runs parallel to the Susquehanna River.  It is now one of those glorious moments when everything seems to be right and blessed.  The river is unspeakably gorgeous and I feel wonderful.  

I see a sign for a donut shop ahead, and decide to pick up a donut and coffee to make the wonderful moment even more so.  I pull into the parking lot and get off my bicycle.  I have been considering getting a single donut for this moment's nourishment or three donuts: one for the moment plus two for future nourishment.  I notice that one of the pedals is missing from my bike, which is a surprise because I hadn't noticed this while I was pedaling.  I make a mental note to get a new pair of pedals from my favorite bike shop when I get home - and possibly consider a brand new bike.  

The donut shop is a very small "Mom and Pop" outfit, and I notice quickly that there are very few donuts available and very few display spots for donuts at any time -- and all the donuts are in a single tray behind the counter.  Not my favorite style of donut, but that's okay.  I mentally prepare my order as the nice older lady behind the counter starts to come over to me.  

I wake up to Alexa's alarm.

Bad Dream 227 -- Richard wants to burn down the house

This dream is a bit sketchy.  It came to me that way...

In my dream, I am standing in the house Deb and I owned for several decades -- that would be 419 W. Union Street in West Chester.  It was built in the very early 20th century and we were both very fond of it.   

I'm simply standing in the house as several people are moving about.  It turns out that my older brother Richard has a plan to burn the house down.  He's been trying to convince our mother that it would be a good idea, as there would be a financial benefit after the fire is done its work.  Mom is not convinced, but has decided not to interfere with Richard's plans as he is probably right.  Typical of her.  

At one point, Richard slows down his moving around to explain to me how this plan will work.  He talks rapidly, and there's a certain logic to what he says, but I recognize several assumptions he's made in his analysis that are unlikely to work or be true.  But if Mom (and other family members?) are not going to interfere, I realize that there's nothing I can do.  

The fire starts in the upper part of the house.  And I think "Well, at least the fire will take some time to burn down to the lower levels, so the actual inferno won't be as large -- at any given time -- as it might have been if he had started it on the ground floor or basement."

Somewhere along the way, I realize that most all of my belongings are still in the house and will be completely destroyed in the blaze.  I'm highly distressed about this.  Richard's plan is about the house and it doesn't include my stuff.  I move around to try and collect my most precious (emotionally, not financially) items but only come across a couple members of the Zoo Gang.  And those I pick up.

Even though I thought the fire had started in the upper parts of the house, at one point, I see smoke rising lazily through the boards of the flooring into a room that isn't on fire yet.

As the indications appear that the fire is growing, I think/hope that Richard may be right.  But I find it highly unlikely.

Bad Dream 226A -- Djembe or Donuts? -- Analysis

My first "key" into this dream was the feeling that the dream pivots at the empty building and my brief discussion with Al Meador.  When I enter the building, I am in  search of a Djembe.  When I leave, I'm in search of a donut shop.

THE OFFICE -- the office seems to represent my everyday humdrum(!) existence.

WHY A DRUM? -- in addition to the "humdrum reference mentioned above, the other potential wordplay reference is quite possibly Thoreau"s reference to a "different drummer."  As I continue to consider and try to understand introversion.   

THE EMPTY BUILDING -- this seems to represent the here-and-now.  The room has been used significantly in the past, but is now empty -- awaiting a new usage.  

AL MEADOR -- A student I knew at Drexel.  Wonderfully smart in a whole variety of fields and a great but subtle sense of humor.  He was -- and hopefully sitll is -- a polymath.  I might qualify as a superficial polymath. 

BUYING DONUTS FOR OTHERS -- It may mean something that I'm abandoning getting a drum for myself in favor of getting donuts for others. 

SHABBY DONUT SHOP -- What's in here has been here for a long time.

CHAOS IN THE DONUT SHOP -- My various "parts."  Some making donuts, some ordering and eating donuts. 

YOUNG PRETTY WAITRESS -- See below.  

CHANGE WITHOUT AN ORDER -- Reward for things I haven't done yet?  Things that I did and "paid for" without recalling what/which?  OR I can't expect any help from my various "parts" to get donuts?  With help from Regina, the possible wordplay of "change."  As in moving from this to that.  And that is part -- or maybe most or all -- of what I would get from feeding donuts to those people.  And my waitperson walks away because it's now on me to consider and pilot that change.